|
...to
make a life a little bit easier!
|
|
|
|
|
Old telephone books make ideal personal
address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of
people you don't know.
|
|
|
Fool other drivers into thinking you
have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video
remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across
the road and mounting the curb.
|
|
|
Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork
and rancid tuna. I found that the subsequent food poisoning
enabled me to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.
|
|
|
Avoid parking tickets by leaving your
windshield wipers turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your
car parked illegally.
|
|
|
No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in
masking tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.
|
|
|
Save on booze by drinking cold tea
instead of whiskey. The following morning you can create the
effects of hangover by drinking a thimble full of dish washing
liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.
|
|
|
If a person is choking on an ice cube,
don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down their
throat and presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.
|
|
|
Apply red nail polish to your nails
before clipping them. The red nails will be much easier to
spot on your bathroom carpet. (Unless you have a red carpet,
in which case a contrasting polish should be selected).
|
|
|
Color coordinate your pet with your
furniture and carpets. That way, the hair won't show if you
don't regularly sweep it up.
|
Pass on
these helpful tips to a friend!
|
