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Your biggest concern about
dancing is falling.
Your back goes out more than
you do.
You no longer laugh at
Preparation H commercials.
You have a dream about
prunes.
You tell the barber to comb it
over the best he can.
Your Chihuahua weighs more than
25 pounds.
You read the obituaries
daily.
Digestion is a consideration
when reading a menu.
You are alarmed by how young
your doctor is.
You think about Walter Cronkite
at least once a day.
You wear knee high stockings
with everything.
Your idea of a perfect nightcap
is Metamuscil.
You find no humor in bladder
control jokes.
You can't climb a tree...even
with a ladder.
You browse the bran cereal
section in the grocery store.
You play golf with your
wife.
You don't like to drive after
dark.
Nobody ever tells you to slow
down.
You recognize the song playing
on this page,
you just can't remember the name of it.
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